Yarr! Tis I! The Dread Pirate Ripley Cat!
Most recently, I been noticin’ me ship has sunk into squalor.
Mom: Uh….squalor? Really? I think that’s a little harsh, don’t you?
YARR! Silence, wench!
Mom: Excuse me? Did you just call me a wench?
Silence! Else I’ll string ye up for insubordination and talkin’ back to a pirate, I will!
Mom: Whatever. You better watch yourself or no tuna for you tonight.
Quit distractin’ me, woman! So as I was tellin’ ye, I been noticin’ that me ship has fallen to rack and ruin in recent times and so I endeavored to motivate me crew to get things in order. I set about puttin’ me First Mate Abby on the job.
Finally – after
many moons an hour – I was notified that the task was complete.
Shiver me timbers! Tis not perfection…but tis an improvement and I won’t be makin’ ye walk the plank.